spring miscellany
20/04/2010
Solitary Crane Fly
Spring is a lovely time. The bugs are out to play. And the plants are great gathering places for their activities. I know that because I’m guilty. Of snapping bugs. Doing their “birds and bees”. Yup. I’ve sunk to the level. I’m a bug-pr0n0grapher. My folks are going to be so proud.
In other news, it’s been a bit bizarre, but more and more of my family is showing up on Facebook. I’m now wondering if applying my usual criteria for invites is going to bear some consequences I’m not prepared for. I rejected an invite to connect from my cousin’s daughter. She’s probably only 7 or so, in my mind she shouldn’t even be near Facebook, much less on it. Perhaps her parents are administering the account for her. So I ignored an invite from her mom as well. Just to be consistent, and well, I haven’t lost my fondness for hyphenated married names either.
On the one hand, I like that more and more people whose lives I still want to get updates about are on Facebook, doing just that. On the other, knowing the kind of exposure that’s involved I wonder why people put their kids on. Yes, it’s novelty. But I suppose so is taking a hike.
am i happy?
12/04/2010
Today I caught a friend online, and he asked me if I’m happier these days. I think he asked that because months ago he asked if I was happy and I said no. And I guess perhaps he’s taking it like alchoholism, after you fall into unhappiness and decide to do something about it, you take it a day at a time.
I used to think happiness was a definite state: you either are or you’re not. If you’re laughing all the time, smiling with not a care in the world, that’s it. When you don’t have to go to work for a few days and are lying on a beach somewhere doing absolutely nothing, that’s it. If you get what you want when you want it, that’s it.
But is it?
Is happiness doing what makes me happy all the time? Is happiness contingent on someone else? Is it something bestowed upon? I’ve no clue. How did I go around chasing something so badly defined? Is it even something you can go after like a turkey for dinner?
Am I happy though? Perhaps. If happiness is a scale, I would suppose I am happier than I was a year ago. The presence of a possible long term goal, however vaguely defined, is quite motivating. The only thing that’s clear to me for now is that perhaps looking at happiness as an absolute term is unrealistic. Life, on the whole, is pretty imperfect, unbalanced in a sense. Therefore to expect absolutes in a concept such as happiness was a legacy from childhood when the world was more white and black.
So am I happy? I am happier. But it’s not like some kind of body fat measurement where you can say, if you past a certain percentage, you’re obese. Am I happy on the whole? That’s more a frame of mind issue, and I think I am inherently positive enough to be happy on the whole. I am somewhat content. There is lots to be glad for, taking everything around me into account, so there is little reason to be unhappy. Unfortunately the lack of unhappiness is not the definition, really, of happiness. So I guess I am somewhat happy.
Too bad it takes a ton of internal monologue and a lame soliloquy to answer it. IM conversations are over in a flash. Perhaps I can answer the question better next time.
how about a combination?
09/04/2010
I’m liking this Cantonese boy (almost as much as the original by Estelle). Yeah, I know it’s made its rounds around the tripledubs, but it’s got that cute stuckinyourhead kinda catchy thanks to the original tune.
free association
28/03/2010
My house guest for the week
No, it’s not like the People’s Association (PA). Nor is it like if I’m a Wee and the ex-President is a Wee that makes me a super-elite where it counts. No such luck, unfortunately. Explored it once in Consumer Behaviour class, though it’s mostly a psych thing.
Today my day started innocuously enough. Sunday morning, no rain is falling. I wake up, greet my house guest, and change his linens while he has his breakfast. Afterwhich I proceeded to have a bowl of cereal and read the papers (sfgate.com). They had an article about pancakes. I like pancakes, they’re tasty. They make good pancakes here.
KF finally gets up and we decide we are going to do our 3 mile Mall trek. Last week we walked to a nearby mall, and roundtrip was about 3.6 miles (we stopped here and there, checked out homes along the way, and made a stop at Walgreens). We decided to go for our walk again today, so off we went. On a tangent. KF decides we need to check out some other area, so we skip the mall trek. But about 15 minutes into it, I started getting hungry, and we end up at Lakeside Cafe. Where there is no lake.
Brunch was a diced ham omelette with potatoes. KF had a burger. Nope, skipped the pancakes. Clean and nice, and you don’t smell of food when you get out. Fairly crowded as well.
he's a cute one
And now I’m back at home, lazing by the rest of my Sunday, what else can I be expected to do but check out the deals online?
And for some reason today I find myself looking at the Olympus Micro 4/3 cameras. I’m even comparing them today! In a DP Review side-by-side with my current 400D.
Restraint is a concept for food, not cameras.
Today I found something interesting in a friend’s blogroll. Aptly named I eat. I shoot. I post. it didn’t take too much for my curiosity to be piqued.
Boy was it a stupid idea.
What ensued was a very well kept blog of a Singaporean foodie. We already have the reputation of photographing and writing about food religiously, and this blog does nothing if not reinforce that notion. We’re going to have to work really hard at changing the global perception that we’re a tropical island full of ass-whipping foodaholics, with no tolerance for chewing gum. Oh and that food photography is a national past-time.
It would be absolutely delightful if I could just nip out right away and try something in the blog. He’s got a nice section on BCM that I’m quite enthusiastic about. However. Reality is a cold bitch. In the reality I live in, where instant gratification is the order du jour, and I get the shoes I ordered online within two days (hehehe!), patience isn’t exactly a virtue I’ve honed.
Restraint I practice often, and it’s that which keeps me from a) trying out the local Singaporean fare in California and getting my heart broken; repeatedly b) flying back every 2 weeks’ when the munchies catch up with me.
So how bad an idea was it? Let’s just say I started salivating uncontrollably, and in desperation at 11.30pm, I settled for a bowl of 出前一丁 in Chicken which, thankfully, was pretty close to my favourite Myojo which isn’t available here. Score!
It’s been an hour since I wolfed that bowl of noodles and that egg I poached so perfectly in the soup. It’s not exactly what I wanted, but I’m telling myself it’s what I needed. I was hungry!
Anyway. A picture to take my mind off food.
Winter in San Francisco can be so pleasant!
hello Spring!
20/03/2010
It’s the vernal equinox today, so besides the day being as long as the night, it’s also the official start of Spring. This Spring has been good so far, in fact, in the last two weeks the weather has been very Spring/Summer like, it’s sunny and warm and we can run around in tee shirts most days.
We also found a new public pool that opened up near where we live. I am a little wary of public swimming places – seriously, kids do all sorts of things in pools – so I’m not really convinced it’s that great an idea. However, the flip side is I’ve not swum in years. I do miss it a little.
In other news, I called my parents on Skype again tonight, and my 4 year old niece was staying over with them. She proceeded to speak to me in a fake American/British accent for more than an hour. I asked if she was speaking to me that way because I sounded that way, but she evaded the question and just replied I sounded odd on the computer.
a festivus for the rest of us
13/03/2010
Today, let’s review the difference between a privilege and a right. In short, a privilege is an advantage or source of pleasure granted to a person. Whereas a right would be a just claim or title, whether legal, prescriptive, or moral.
Here is the difference. A privilege is granted. Therefore, when you do not possess the pleasure of which you are requesting, it is a privilege. Consequently, whether you receive that requested pleasure or not, is completely out of your hands. On the flip side, the person from which that pleasure is requested has every right to grant it or not. Since he he possesses the pleasure giving gift, it would seem.
Get it? When you want something, it’s a privilege you’re seeking. When you have something, it’s a right. If you want ice cream, and Mommy has to buy it for you, then having ice cream for you is a privilege. And if Mommy says you can’t have it before dinner, that’s that. Because you don’t have ice cream to begin with. Mommy does. However, since Mommy bought ice cream she can have it anytime she wants. It’s her right, since the ice cream is her property.
Now that the groundwork is laid out nicely, I’ll come out and say it. It is a fool’s prerogative to utter truths that no one else will speak.
In general, I don’t care whether it’s your wedding anniversary or your kid’s birthday. I don’t particularly care what your kid said to his mommy, I don’t care if you had clowns at your wedding. And I sure as hell don’t really care about the dry ice, designer gown, “From This Moment” music, your rings, your vows, your journey… you get the picture. Who would? It’s really got nothing to do with me.
“Ah”, you say, “You selfish, self-important, ego maniacal, self-serving, social-norm bucking, feelingless bitch”.
At your service.
See, this is where comprehending the difference between a privilege and a right would come in handy. Since, by reasonable deduction, sticking stuff on Facebook means you’re searching for some sort of affirmation under the guise of sharing, it means you want something from me.
I sure as hell understand that, I do it too. I assault you with my half-assed, 2 gazillion shots of the same thing photos. The only reason why I put up statuses is to show you I’ve done something, or that I want you to think I’m smart. Because I am looking for some sort of affirmation. Try as I may to self soothe, I do realise that life does not exist in a vacuum. So I try to keep it to me. Since I’m the one who implicitly has the relationship with someone on Facebook, not my kid (it helps I don’t have any), not my significant other (he can speak for himself). Yes. I am that self-serving, self-important, person.
So I suppose here is the quandary. I can always NOT have those friends on Facebook. But friendships being the way they are, sometimes it is hard to draw the line without looking even more as a misanthrope.
I can always hide those updates. Yes, I do engage in active status message housekeeping. My list is shrinking! HHAAH.
I know I’m asking for something too. I’m asking for a modicum of self-awareness. I’m asking for my acquaintances to consider my feelings before assaulting me with their rather pedestrian obsessions. That being the case, I can no more expect change than they can expect me to respond. They probably don’t even want a response from me. True. The complications of obligation.
That isn’t to say, I’m not interested in everyone’s updates. There are people I care about, whose kids, happiness, general well-being and progress I care about. These are people I probably would solicit updates from, in addition to hearing about it on Facebook. I’d hate to have to find out from a Facebook status update that someone I consider a friend in the true sense of the word just had a kid. But I suppose, it’s a privilege. Not a right.
I’m not anti-kid and anti-wedding. Well, who cares if I were. But it’s not like I’m going to scowl at you if you had a wedding and invited me to it. Heaven knows I’ve been to one too many, but I understand the moral ramifications and I toe the party line. I understand that most people like having their friends about when they celebrate something, so I show up, generally happy to be considered a friend. I am happy for their union. And I usually tell them so.
But seriously, unless I aided and abetted your union, I’m not the least bit interested in your anniversary, or in reliving your wedding a year on. Why would I? Let’s not even get into the issues involved with putting up wedding photos and videos and all.
You know. Maybe in 20 years. Let’s talk about being married for 20 years. Other than that, everyone else has more pressing matters to attend to. Like relieving their bladder. Or clipping their nails. Or whinging about the emotionally needy. You know? Real issues!
On a side note, I just caught all three episodes (so far) of The Marriage Ref. It’s a cute premise, but I’m not so sure the format really works. It really only works if the guests are funny, but that’s not to say that three funny guests would make a good show. I like the episode with Larry David, Madonna and Ricky Gervais, but only because of the dynamics between those three. And I like that Larry David is funny to watch. And he can make Ricky Gervais cringe. That’s beautiful irony.
The episode with Tina Fey, Jerry Seinfeld and Eva Longoria-Parker was meh.
3 poison pee’s
10/03/2010
I love Seinfeld. Something about that series is just different and genuinely funny. And over here, it’s on TV every day! It’s hard to pick a favourite, but the chronologically backwards episode is right up there. The one where they go to India for a wedding.
Anyway, recently Jerry Seinfeld gave an interview in some magazine, and here’s a gem about parenting:
Seinfeld has three rules of parenting, what he calls “the poison Ps.” The first is Praise—“We tell our kids, ‘Great job!’ too much,” he says. The second is Problem-solving—“We refuse to let our children have problems. Problem-solving is the most important skill to develop for success in life, and we for some reason can’t stand it if our kids have a situation that they need to ‘fix.’ Let them struggle—it’s a gift.”
Just as he’s explaining the third P—“Giving your child too much Pleasure”—a woman comes in the deli with her three young daughters and buys them all huge cookies. “Can you believe this?” Seinfeld says, gesturing like his TV counterpart used to. “It’s 5:30 p.m.—when will they have dinner? At 8?”
It explains so much. It explains all those whiney contestants on American Idol who can’t believe that 1) Simon is telling it like it is – ie they suck and should stop singing forever 2) they don’t have any talent 3) they aren’t going to be a hit anywhere on earth.
It’s a good thing I boil my water before I drink it, but someone please tell me if I catch a case of delusion, thanks.
Waiting for the Spring Forward
05/03/2010
Yay. Just a bit over a week to the official start of Spring. Well. It is scheduled to arrive at the equinox (usually 20 Mar), and that pretty much is like the start of the superfast slide downhill all the way towards the long, warm summer days.
Spring forward is scheduled for 14 Mar (beware the Ides!) – so we’ll be sleeping an hour less and winding the clock forward an hour for the impression that the day is longer. Until it really is. Then it’s a bit over the top. However, that little bit of admin makes calling Singapore an hour more convenient. Haha.
Looking forward to April when TV will get back to normal.
Happy Birthday Michael Chang!
22/02/2010
Sure, you’re old. Put on a little weight, probably lost a little hair.
Ok, I saw you hogging ginseng and stuff on a poster in Chinatown.
But you’ll always own a special place in my heart.
Many happy returns!
